Are You Making These Body Language Mistakes With Your Hands?
By John Alexander
Author, How to Become an Alpha Male
Unfortunately, what you do with your hands can be one of the quickest non-verbal ways to destroy the attraction that a woman feels for you, because the wrong hand movements can communicate that you are a low-status, beta male.
To make matters worse, your hands can be particularly tough to manage because, let's face it, when you feel nervous, the hardest thing in the world is figuring out what to do with your hands!
For success with your dating and seduction of women, make sure you don't make the following body language mistakes with your hands.
MISTAKE ONE. Displaying your anxiety with your hands.
You do this when you:
1) Shred napkins.
2) Make your hands into fists.
3) Sit on your hands.
4) Hold something and play with it.
5) Twiddle your fingers or thumbs.
6) Hold your hands unnaturally still.
7) Sit on your hands to avoid having the woman see them tremble.
Although you might be feeling nervous, the last thing you want to do is to let the woman detect you feel that way.
Instead you want to convey that you're calm and in control. Nothing attracts a woman more than a man who's laid back and confident.
MISTAKE TWO. Putting your fingers into your mouth.
When you bite your nails or otherwise chew on your fingers, you are, according to psychologists, doing the same thing that infants are doing when they suck their mother's breast.
For a baby, breast feeding provides comfort. When we became toddlers, our thumbs replaced our mom's nipple.
And then as adults, biting our thumbnail does the same thing. Ever noticed that when you're out in public, you mainly bite your nails when you're under pressure?
THE SOLUTION. Just hold your hands relaxed on the table.
Rest your forearms on the table, keeping your arms open and letting them drop forward.
Keep your hands and arms open and relaxed. Most of the time this means having them about 18 inches or half a meter apart, your palms facing each other, with fingers curved slightly upward.
As your palms face each other, they should also face the woman. Open palms convey honesty and being completely comfortable with yourself. Having the back of your hands facing her can often convey that you're hiding something.
Demonstrating your confidence can be as easy as that! Stop twiddling your thumbs and watch the women flock to you.
John Alexander is author of How to Become an Alpha Male a dating and seduction success guide for men which will improve your body language and confidence.
http://www.thegamesgotrules.com
Showing posts with label confidence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label confidence. Show all posts
Monday, March 19, 2007
Monday, February 19, 2007
The Number One Secret Behind the Alpha Male's Body Language
The Number One Secret Behind the Alpha Male's Body Language
By John Alexander
Author, How to Become an Alpha Male
Watch a man with high status--Brad Pitt, George Clooney, or the CEO where you work--and you'll notice that he moves differently than the rest of us. He gives off vibes that he is hot stuff, and because of that, women get soaking wet over him.
You, too, can create that aura that makes you attractive to women.
Have you ever noticed the way your friends look when they're all nervous? They're looking down at the ground with their arms crossed, fidgeting, with their voices cracking and their eyes bugged out.
And when you give off that kind of body language yourself, women don't want to be around you.
Now, think about successful guys. They've got girls all over them and some great body language going on.
So, what's the number one secret between those high status guys and the low status guys? You've probably guessed it... the alpha males are relaxed and in control when it comes to social situations.
Make no mistake about it... relaxation is the most important mental state for you to be in.
With that in mind, here are some pointers for you to develop the mindset and body language of an alpha male (and by the way, if you think they're easy, you're right... you can make these changes as early as tonight and have even the hottest girls clamoring for your attention):
1. Don't allow yourself to feel worried. Just let your worries go, since you can't solve any problem by worrying. So suck it up, and quit thinking about what might go wrong. Just live life.
Now, I know what I just said is easier said than done (to use an old--but relevant in this case--cliche). You've spent your whole life up until now dwelling on thoughts that make you feel worried.
But what is this emotion we call "worry"? When you think about it, it's simply the fear of what might happen in the future. Essentially you're punishing yourself by feeling upset before anything bad has happened. It makes no logical sense to worry!
So the solution is to avoid contemplating your worrisome thoughts anymore. Identify them for what they are... toxic to your emotional state, and... let them go.
Simply not dwelling on negative outcomes that make you feel upset will reduce 90% of your worries.
2. A second strategy to relax is to breathe through your abdomen rather than your chest.
When you breathe, imagine that you're bringing air down to your stomach. Feel your belly rise and fall as you breathe.
3. Avoid nonverbal behaviors that are the opposite of relaxation:
- Raising your shoulders.
- Wrinkling your forehead.
- Fidgeting with your hands and/or legs.
- Tightening your facial muscles.
4. Relax all your muscles and slow down all of your movements a notch.
Alpha males generally move unhurriedly, as if they are in control of time itself. Beta males are nervous and make jerky movements. Imagine you are standing and walking through a swimming pool, where your movements are slow and fluid.
5. Relax your eyes and eyelids.
Beta males hold their eyelids wide open because they are so nervous. Their eyes dart all around. Instead let your eyelids rest. Look straight ahead. Only give things your attention if they interest you. While you're out and about, do the affirmation to yourself, "I am sexual, I am relaxed, and I am in control."
6. If someone wants your attention, move your head slowly.
A trait common to many beta males is being so eager to please that when someone calls their name, you see them spin their heads toward the person unnaturally fast.
John Alexander is author of How to Become an Alpha Male ... a seduction success guide for men. Learn more advanced tips on how to develop the mind set and body language of an alpha male.
http://www.thegamesgotrules.com
Other Blogs about becoming an alpha male:
Blogspot
LiveJournal
Typepad
Myspace
Wordpress
Xanga
Weblogs
Blog
Yahoo 360
By John Alexander
Author, How to Become an Alpha Male
Watch a man with high status--Brad Pitt, George Clooney, or the CEO where you work--and you'll notice that he moves differently than the rest of us. He gives off vibes that he is hot stuff, and because of that, women get soaking wet over him.
You, too, can create that aura that makes you attractive to women.
Have you ever noticed the way your friends look when they're all nervous? They're looking down at the ground with their arms crossed, fidgeting, with their voices cracking and their eyes bugged out.
And when you give off that kind of body language yourself, women don't want to be around you.
Now, think about successful guys. They've got girls all over them and some great body language going on.
So, what's the number one secret between those high status guys and the low status guys? You've probably guessed it... the alpha males are relaxed and in control when it comes to social situations.
Make no mistake about it... relaxation is the most important mental state for you to be in.
With that in mind, here are some pointers for you to develop the mindset and body language of an alpha male (and by the way, if you think they're easy, you're right... you can make these changes as early as tonight and have even the hottest girls clamoring for your attention):
1. Don't allow yourself to feel worried. Just let your worries go, since you can't solve any problem by worrying. So suck it up, and quit thinking about what might go wrong. Just live life.
Now, I know what I just said is easier said than done (to use an old--but relevant in this case--cliche). You've spent your whole life up until now dwelling on thoughts that make you feel worried.
But what is this emotion we call "worry"? When you think about it, it's simply the fear of what might happen in the future. Essentially you're punishing yourself by feeling upset before anything bad has happened. It makes no logical sense to worry!
So the solution is to avoid contemplating your worrisome thoughts anymore. Identify them for what they are... toxic to your emotional state, and... let them go.
Simply not dwelling on negative outcomes that make you feel upset will reduce 90% of your worries.
2. A second strategy to relax is to breathe through your abdomen rather than your chest.
When you breathe, imagine that you're bringing air down to your stomach. Feel your belly rise and fall as you breathe.
3. Avoid nonverbal behaviors that are the opposite of relaxation:
- Raising your shoulders.
- Wrinkling your forehead.
- Fidgeting with your hands and/or legs.
- Tightening your facial muscles.
4. Relax all your muscles and slow down all of your movements a notch.
Alpha males generally move unhurriedly, as if they are in control of time itself. Beta males are nervous and make jerky movements. Imagine you are standing and walking through a swimming pool, where your movements are slow and fluid.
5. Relax your eyes and eyelids.
Beta males hold their eyelids wide open because they are so nervous. Their eyes dart all around. Instead let your eyelids rest. Look straight ahead. Only give things your attention if they interest you. While you're out and about, do the affirmation to yourself, "I am sexual, I am relaxed, and I am in control."
6. If someone wants your attention, move your head slowly.
A trait common to many beta males is being so eager to please that when someone calls their name, you see them spin their heads toward the person unnaturally fast.
John Alexander is author of How to Become an Alpha Male ... a seduction success guide for men. Learn more advanced tips on how to develop the mind set and body language of an alpha male.
http://www.thegamesgotrules.com
Other Blogs about becoming an alpha male:
Blogspot
LiveJournal
Typepad
Myspace
Wordpress
Xanga
Weblogs
Blog
Yahoo 360
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